For more than twenty years I have been dealing with personal and business crises caused by personal disorders from childhood. That is why I have specialized in “cutting” bonds out of precociousness and developing the potentials that have slept so long because of psychological “garbage”.
In all these years I have “saved” at least 1,000 people, all over the world. The mare from Kovač is usually barefoot or she runs much slower because you are alone in the problem and then you see no solution. Well, in this case I could say as an excuse that I did not find a psychotherapist who was good enough for me.
When I think back to my childhood, I remember that I was “ashamed” of some things, namely that I became interested in space very quickly, so that my first books from the library were about the universe.
So I always made sure that nobody saw which books I secretly borrowed and read. In no case I found a conversation partner, I was 9 years old. In the same year I also started dancing in a dance group. At the age of ten I started to write songs in secret. I was different, I felt that everything I did was not acceptable for the environment I lived in, in the suburbs of Ptuj. So I distanced myself from society and locked myself into my world where I was creatively active.
I had my own laboratory where I made “soaps”. I wrote stories and songs. I had all the walls plastered with pictures of planets and stars. At the same time, there was alcohol in the family circle and the resulting violence, so that I completely isolated myself from this world. I began to live in a world of my own. Only in high school did I realize that the environment in which I lived had become too narrow for me. But I still remained in my hometown.
Why do I write about childhood when I want to answer the question: “Why do not I want to go back to Slovenia? I have to start with the cause, which in many cases lies in childhood. So the first step is always important; why do not you want something today.
I studied in neighboring Maribor, where I went every day from Ptuj. Then I got my first job in my home town, where I opened a shop. I married a local woman and we stayed in our hometown. With all the steps I took, I would be dissatisfied. I knew all this, I felt it, but I did not have the strength to overcome it. Although I was already working as a psychotherapist at that time. Until one day at the age of 30 I collapsed, I just could not breathe, I literally started to “vomit” wherever I had a bad feeling. I looked for a personal fitness trainer, started doing different energy therapies… and so I slowly gathered enough courage to leave Ptuj at the age of
33 and finally leave Ptuj. But obviously not far enough, because I was still dissatisfied with the acceptance of the environment, I just did not feel satisfied, so I started to look for new challenges and on recommendation I ran for president of Olympic Committee of Slovenia. At that time I was not aware of it, but I fell into a circle that had been operating with the same cast for almost 40 years, and I was in that circle as an intruder. When I looked at things from a distance, I basically saw that it was a strongly connected “community” or, as it is called in modern terms, a “lobby”. At that moment I thought of lobbies as follows:
»Sports lobbies or interest groups were not created intentionally, or are they professional groups, but are exclusively people for whom this is the only meaning of life! I can say this after three years of intensive work. in the national industry association and through their professional eyes.
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Each association was founded on the basis of a few interests, founded by up-and-coming boys to have fun, enjoy and develop at the same time at these gatherings. At some point, however, when they met this need on their part, some withdrew from these associations because they had higher goals. Or in other words. If we do not put our personal goal in life first, we will never be satisfied, but we will always look for meaning in our work, in our hobbies, in other things. And so the boys, who after decades had the only meaning of life in the conviviality through sport, are still active members of these associations, which is their only stimulus for life. And these guys basically represent Sports Lobby.
The lobbies in sport mentioned above are not primarily about money, but about “food” that fills their ego (to put it bluntly). These lobbies usually have no or no important function, if at all. However, with their direct comments they have a very strong influence on those who lead and decide. Today we call these lobby groups “uncles from the background”. In other words, they are elderly people who enjoy a reputation in an association that they once founded themselves. However, human psychology works in such a way that someone who has been around for a long time knows everything, even if he has essentially not moved for 30 years and the whole technique and method of sport has, according to his way of thinking, moved far into the future.
And every sports federation has such a club of “uncles from the background” who have their table in the club bar and from there they manage the daily and
strategic policy of this sport. Basically they do not even think badly, they just comment, they just have fun, that they do not have a long time. However, people like coaches, functionaries who only occasionally come near them and listen to their debates or even talk to them, feel they know exactly what to do and, with a guilty conscience, hurry immediately to pass on the information (just because their self-esteem is low and they have no goal or identity of their own). However, since there is always distortion and misunderstanding in the transmission of information, the information passed on by “uncles in the background”, both for fun via one of the couriers to the Presidency or to the crowd, can cause immense discord and material damage.
To give an example from personal experience: As president of the national federation, I had to provide additional funds to close the season, so I took out a loan with a bank where I mortgaged my assets, partly the company, because “uncles in the background” said that I was definitely doing something wrong; the other authorities blocked the union’s work to check these rumors. Because the trade union was blocked, there was also a blockade of my business accounts, which eventually led to the company being on the verge of collapse, I had to lay off 12 employees, endangering 12 families, I lost confidence in banks, business partners and finally in the public (the company was ranked 121st among the fastest growing companies in Slovenia, on the gazelle scale for 2012). And this only because the “uncles in the background” suspected something. Thus, an insignificant beer debate to shorten the afternoons can completely ruin the lives of some people, like the story of a butterfly that swings its wings in Africa and causes a hurricane in Central America…
So the uncles in the background are really a harmless gang, who only for a short time. But the problem is the lack of self-confidence and immaturity of the others who move around them. Who do not know what is true and what is not. So who is to blame, the uncles or the boys around them? Basically one and the other. If I make a comparison with a vegetable garden and these boys are a young lettuce that needs to grow… …but if the garden is full of weeds, it will never grow into a lush lettuce, but will always remain dwarfish and tasteless. Therefore, these weeds must first be removed so that the lettuce can grow normally. The same should also apply to sports associations. It would be necessary to keep a safe distance from the “uncles in the background”, and we should have the function of wise men where we would be advised first and foremost. Today’s young functionaries should primarily build on self-confidence, on their real self image, so that they can decide their own fate and the reorientation of sports associations. They themselves, however, were so stable that they would take the opinion of the wise men only as a guide in decision-making, but not as the absolute truth.
As I was very close to winning my election campaign at that moment, I began to receive warnings from all quarters, criminal charges, false announcements in the media, business interruptions… only to never think about trying to get back in their circle. Maybe I can describe a case that occurred the day before the election for president of the OKS. The sports faculty UM celebrated its 50th anniversary at Ljubljana Castle, where both candidates were present. It looked as if I was at one end and he at the other end of the hall. I stood alone and everyone around him. A quarter of an hour later, the President of the Republic came to me and congratulated me on my courageous act. I can say that this is a lobby that the top echelons of the country fear, and I was treated and “punished” accordingly.
As I was already living partly in Belgrade at that time and enrolled for a doctoral thesis at Crisis Management, I moved to Belgrade and from there later to North America, South America, United Arab Emirates and finally to Switzerland. My starting point was still Belgrade.
Two years ago I returned to Slovenia with the intention of settling all the outstanding issues that remained from that time. Of course, this was almost
impossible, because I also wanted to redesign the business environment here. It was a rejection based on what was written on the Internet ten years ago and never checked. I had to prove for each business individually what was true and what was not, and some simply said they were afraid of getting into some kind of media affair. And so I decided to go back abroad. I can no longer imagine life in Slovenia.Unless current politics and the situation turn everything upside down.
So if I do a self-analysis now!
Apparently the fear was born very early and only grew or reached its peak at the age of 35 when she ran for the office of OKS. I could say that my feelings or my way of life in fear have already been “instilled” by my parents. Apparently they lived in fear too, and I simply took this way of life upon myself. But I developed my potential deep inside of me. Just as I developed all my potential abroad.
I have listed only a few facts about what I could give to Slovenia and help it to become a world leader. But because of the lobbies that I wanted to change, I am of course no longer welcome here. After all, many people have used this for completely different stories, that they have cleared their name or profited from it or even made sacrifices…
So when I look for those who are leaving Slovenia or want to return to Slovenia, or give them advice. Slovenia is a very beautiful country to live in. Just do not go into public life and do not earn money outside. Do not push into different circles. This way you will remain unbiased. Despite all my knowledge I still have to fight with this fear. However, it is true that as soon as you start talking about these things, the purification process begins. So this period of selfisolation was designed to… to cleanse myself of all fears and perhaps one day visit Slovenia.
Thank you for your attention.
Dynamic Leadership model
The purpose of the book is to present a dynamic leadership model, which in more than a hundred cases has proven to be a great way to get out of business and personal crisis and how to overcome difficulties without even going into crisis.